In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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