i can't believe i had my finger in that
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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