We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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