Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
