U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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