Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
