North Korea, Best Korea!
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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