how can u be prego again
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Less talking, more tequila
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize