there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
