Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
