this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
