I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize