You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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