Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize