Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I'm always down for nudity.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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