In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize
