I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
