I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
