yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
