HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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