just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
