remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
