You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
