So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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