i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
just tell him i said nine months
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize