she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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