In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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