I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
