last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize