so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
