I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize
