Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize