I'm really into asian looking animals
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize