So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
