Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
