i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Operation Purity has been aborted
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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