dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
