Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
