Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize