First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
This is the high leading the old right now
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize