You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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