no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
and i looked up. we had an audience...
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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