Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize