you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
