Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
