The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
