Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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