yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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