where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
