if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
id be glad to
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
