epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Randomize
