Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
