Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Randomize
